hi bimbi ko, first of all (oo alam kong korni yung ganitong intro pero bakit ba), tanghali ko to isesend sayo para di ka maiyak, kasi kung kagabi ko to sinend baka iiyak ka e atsaka baka mafeel mong mag isa ka,hindi ko hinihiling na magreply ka rito sa mga sinabi ko ah ang gusto ko lang basta mabasa mo kung ano yung mga gusto kong sabihin,sana basahin mo nang mabuti to halos mapudpod na daliri ko sa pagtatype e sorry kung ang kulit kulit ko ah pero promise last na to para di ka na maasar sakin, ayoko kasi lumayo sayo na wala manlang proper goodbye kaya ginawa ko tong message na to. IM CRYING NA WHILE TYPING THIS E INTRO PALANG TO SABAY TUGTOG KASI AKO NUNG KANTANG TENSIONADO NGE, pero eto seryoso na kdndvshdhd I just want to say na thank you so much sa 1 year na pagsstay sakin kahit alam kong ilang beses na tayong hindi naging maayos, hindi nagkakaintindihan pero pinipilit parin nating ayusin pero this time wala na e kahit anong pilit kong ayusin wala na, kasi wala ka ng feelings sakin, ang sakit sakit lang sa part ko na ginagawa ko naman lahat, lagi kitang iniintindi, binabaan ko ego ko because all i want is to fix our relationship, pero jie ilang beses pa ba ako magtitiis,masasaktan, ilang beses paba para matauhan din ako? lagi kong naqquestion yung worth ko, ANO/SAAN PA BA AKO NAGKULANG? ANO BANG NAGAWA KO PARA TRATUHIN MO AKO NG GANITO?, kahit pala gawin/ ibuhos ko lahat hindi parin pala ako magiging sapat, lagi mong tandaan na kahit napagod, nasaktan, naubos hindi parin kita iniwan ah alam mo yan jie. hinayaan din kitang maging masama ako sa mga kaibigan mo dahil sa kwento mong binaliktad mo ako, sana naiisip mo lahat lahat jie. mag 2 months na simula nung niloko mo ako pero wala e andito parin yung sakit. no matter how much I try to forgive you, every time i look at you, i always remember the betrayal, the disrespect and mahirap yun kalimutan kahit anong pilit kong di isipin yun, naiisip ko parin e,kahit ikaw yung nagloko ako parin yung nagbeg, ako parin yung nagpupumilit na piliin mo naman sana ako.hahqhqha bakit ang dali dali lang kasi para sayo na palitan ako, ANO BANG MERON KAY CJ? yan yung laging tanong sa utak ko. hindi ko tanggap nung time na yun na bakit dun mo pa ako pinagpalit? nung time na yun i was waiting to fix everything for us, but I saw you happy with someone else ang sakit lang isipin na yung taong mahal mo eh masaya na pero hindi na ikaw yung dahilan, hindi na ikaw yung kasama, MAY CHOICE KA NOON NA PILIIN AKO PERO MAS PINILI MO SI CJ, ILANG BESES YUN ALAM MO YAN, ILANG BESES DIN AKO NAGBIGAY NG CHANCE SAYO KAHIT PAULIT ULIT YUNG NANGYAYARI NAGSTAY AKO, HINDI AKO BUMITAW KASI MAHAL NA MAHAL KITA E , you keep hurting me because u know I keep coming back to youkahit ang sakit sakit na nun andyan parin ako sa tabi mo jie, pero anong ginawa mo, YOU REPEATING THE SAME MISTAKES, OVER AND OVER ginago mo lang ulit ako tas ngayon na binigyan ulit kita ng chance, INIWAN MO NA NAMAN AKO,hindi mo kayang magstay during hard times. NAFELL OUT OF LOVE KA KASI ANO? KASI PAULIT ULIT YUNG NANGYAYARI? KASI MAS NAUUBOS KA PAG MAS PINIPILIT PA NATING MAAYOS? OR KASI SI CJ PARIN? CHOICE MO NA RIN LAPA YAN, yung about din pala sa panglalait mo sakin, pamamahiya sa mga friends mo, pag iignore sakin, namumura mo ako, nasasaktan mo ako through chat and personal/physical natiis ko pala lahat ng yan grabe, pero alam mo iniiwasan ko na lang na maaalala yung mga yan para sana hindi yan yung way para maturn off and madissappoint ako sayo, OKAY LANG SAKIN NA AKO YUNG MASAKTAN WAG LANG AKO YUNG MAKASAKIT, GANYAN KITA KAMAHAL JIE pero hindi mo ata nakikita lahat ng yan kasi mas pinapairal mo yung pride,galit, init ng ulo mo palagi, ALL MY EFFORTS, SACRIFICE WAS WASTE, sinayang mo lahat kahit aware kang nasasaktan ako tinutuloy mo parin, masaya ka parin sa ginagawa mo, kapag hindi tayo ayos, parang hindi lang mundo ang kalaban ko kundi pa ikaw? ang tanga ko pala aa part na I'm asking too much for your attention, you always shut me off na para bang wala akong karapatan magsalita o magpaliwanag sayo, na bakit parang nag hirap mong abutin? bakit kapag lumalapit ako, lalo kang lumalayo? ginagawa ko naman lahat ng kaya ko para ayusin tayo, pero ikaw yung kusang lumalayo. LACK OF COMMUNICATION CAN RUIN EVERYTHING,napansin ko rin na halatang wala ka ng pake kung ano man mga repost, nangyayari about sa life ko, okay lang din sayo na umiiyak ako kahit dugo pa ata yan, wala kang pake sa nararamdaman ko kasi sarili mo lang iniisip mo, YUNG NARARAMDAMAN MO LANG, yan yung pinakaayaw ko sa ugali mo, tingin mo sa sarili mo e ikaw lagi tama hahahhahahah, I HATE YOU FOR TREATING ME LIKE A SHIT. you mean so much to me, but u always invalidate me, sinasabi ko lahat ng to para sayo rin naman. alam mo ba lagi nilang sinasabi sakin na " DONT QUESTION YOUR WORTH" pero naisip ko na, alam naman talaga natin yung worth natin pero dahil mahal natin yung tao, we would step out to our limits, naa minsan kahit alam mong nagmumukha ka ng tanga, hinahayaan mo nalang kase mahal mo eh at umaasa kang baka balang araw, itatrato ka nya the way you deserve to be treated it actually love can really make us do crazy things, and there's nothing wrong with it, naniniwala kasi ako na its okay to step out of your boundaries, its okay na magpakatanga, its okay to take risks kasi kung di man magwork, at least you tried diba?. lagi rin nakatatak sa utak ko na sometimes waiting is the best for everything and waiting is not losing it is what you called trusting and believing in what you wish for pero habang andito pala ako sa process na to, may mga bagay na pala akong nakakalimutan gawin dahil sa pag aantay ko tulad ng pagpapahalaga sa aking sarili, minsan nakakalimutan ko na ring ngumiti ng totoo dahil ang nasa isip ko lagi e kung ano bang pwedeng mangyari satin sa susunod pang mga araw. sobrang sama ng loob ko sainyong lahat hhahahahah. but after that break up, I learned so much. I didn't try to replace you, I chose to focus on myself, to heal, and to do better and be better, maybe i deserve to be happy too, i can be happy without being used by anyone/used anyone.i don't regret anything about us. i gave u the best version of myself. but if there's one thing i wish u could see, it's all the little things i did for u. i wanted to see u achieve everything u once told me about, alam kong gustong gudto mo magkahonor ah alam kong kaya mo yan, proud na proud ako sayo always even if it meant doing it without me in ur life. everything happens for a reason, and sometimes rejection is just redirection. God removed you in my life for a purpose to make space for real love, peace, and growth. i hope someday u will realize that no one's gonna do the same thing i did for u, pero alam mo ng dahil sa ganyang sakit na naramadaman ko, I found my strength, and I'm slowly becoming the best version of me. I just missed how you treat me before, kung pwede lang I wanted to be you forever e, not one of your exes. I really really miss you, I miss us, I miss everything about you. I miss who I was when I was with you, and if dadating man yung time na mahanap mo daan pabalik sakin, sana with more love,more care, and more honesty na, not hoping, but if you ever crossed in your mind and you finds yourself missing me, I will always be here anyway waiting patiently. despite all the heartbreaks i'm grateful i got to love u, and to be loved by u. it's not that i don't love u anymore, but i've come to realize that everything has changed. it's no longer like it used to be. It feels like i finally understood u don't want me anymore. pero sana alam mong i always tried to fix everything as much as I could. i always put u before myself. i didn't care about my mental health bcz i always placed u first, because i loved u so deeply. all i ever wanted was for u to feel loved by me, but ur actions told me to stop. alam ko ring may mga pagkakamali ako sayo, pero alam mong kahit araw araw kaya kong magsorry sayo ginawa ko yun jie. ayaw ko sana ng ganito pero BUT I'M LETTING YOU GO this is was the hardest decision i've ever made. maybe i was never good enough for u, but at least i tried to be better for u. no regrets just an apology for not being enough,i'm not the girl u were hoping to meet (kasi alam kong sa lalake parin naman bagsak mo), not the one u dreamed of, no matter how hard i tried, your actions speak louder. I'm not trying to distant to you, hindi lang talaga kita kayang tignan sa ngayon kasi may feelings pa ako sayo e , pero i hope soon kaya na kitang tignan na wala na akong feelings for you, sana naiintindihan mo yun, i hope maging okay parin tayo as a kachurchmate, kacof na lang,kaschool mate, aalis naman na ako next year, hindi mona ako makikita hehe kung miss mo ako magchat ka lang ah andito lang ako palagi, if want mo magrant, andito ako ha magkakampi tayo dadamayan kita sa lahat ayokong umiiyak ka love na love kita jie alam mo yan, andami ko pang gustong sabihin pero hanggang dito na lang kasi kagabi pa ako umiiyak, alle hindi ko matanggap na hanggang dito na lang pala talaga hahahah. But I'm very thankful kasi nakilala kita, thank you sa pag iintindi sakin pag tinotopak ako, thank you for coming into my life, thank you for making me smile, thank you for being my inspiration , u are the reason why I stayed, kung bakit ako naging matatag, thank u for being my number 1 supporter noon (ngayon iba na kasi sinusupport mo e) thank you for those days I've spent with you by my side and make me feel worthy, I'll never regret making you apart of my life, THANK U FOR THE LESSON AND FOR EVERYTHING, I LOVE SO MUCH FOR THE LAST TIME BABY KO!! 🥹💗💗